Family is such an interesting concept. I have always been a “homeboy”. (well, I had my
rebellion years too, but it was done secretly) My
family, as noisy as it is and as
poor as we were, we are always close and loving. No, we do not peck at each other’s cheek or
bear hug each other when I was growing up… we are more of a caring and loving with your heart and action type.
As an
immigrant, I left home (more like my parents sent me away) to the other side of the globe when I was
18, half my life I lived without being at the proximity of the place I was born. I miss my home very much, especially the closeness with my parents, the
food my mom cook, mingling and solving problems with my
siblings.
Figuring out why I love my
family, home and my hometown so much, was not an easy task. I never could understand it until recently.
Now in my early 30s, I have a little family of my own. (A wonderful wife, two remarkable children and a little home in
Texas) Everything is great, and my (now) 4 years old is going to school and starts to learn to make friends with kids his age. Things are nice… don’t get me wrong… but one trip back to my hometown with my whole family make me see things a little differently now.
My son have never see any of our relatives other than
granddad and grandma who visited every other year or so. So going home in
Winter’s relative cold to a “foreign” country at the
equator’s summer heat was a big concern for me. Never seen any of his cousins, uncles and aunties is the close second.
However, things unwrapped very pleasantly the moment they met each other. All they asked was, “Are you my
cousin?” and with a reply of, “yes”… and they were off to
loud happy fun all day long. My cousin’s sons became my son’s best friend even though they have never met and they do not communicate in the exact same language!
Later that evening on the first encounter, my son said to me, “Dad, I have so many Hon relatives!” “There are so many Hon!” “I am so happy…” And he was, completely happy, and completely loved.
That got me thinking about family, and this is what I’ve learnt:
Family accepts you first before judging you with merits. Making friend with people we do not know is the opposite. You first need to prove yourself useful, or worthy, or indifferent before there’s an acceptance.Now back in
Texas, I miss my family everyday… my son misses his cousins and grandparents every time he slows down. We talk about our relatives every night after
bedtime storys.
Here’s the lyric to a song by
Bon Jovi that become one of my favorite driving music of late.
Who Says You Can't Go HomeI spent twenty years trying to get out of this place
I was looking for something I couldn't replace
I was running away from the only thing I've ever known
Like a blind dog without a bone
I was a gypsy lost in the twilight zone
I hijacked a rainbow and crashed into a pot of gold
I been there, done that
But I ain't looking back on the seeds I've sown
Saving dimes spending too much time on the telephone
Who says you can't go home
(Chorus)
Who says you can't go home
There's only one place they call me one of their own
Just a hometown boy born a rolling stone
Who says you can't go home
Who says you can't go back
I been all around the world and as a matter of fact
There's only one place left I want to go
Who says you can't go home
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright
I went as far as I could, I tried to find a new face
There isn't one of these lines that I would erase
I lived a million miles of memories on that road
With every step I take I know that I'm not alone
You take the home from the boy
But not the boy from his home
These are my streets, the only life I've ever known
Who says you can't go home
(Repeat Chorus)It doesn't matter where you are,
It doesn't matter where you go
If it's a million miles away or just ten miles up the road
Take it in , Take it with you when you go
Who says you can't go home?