Story from an outdoor wedding and a lone fly

I learnt something from a lone little fly, one day.

It was June, at an outdoor wedding. In a hillside location, about an hour and a half from Houston, Texas, fully equipped with a pond, breeze, birds and the be… emmm… insects.

Since the wedding was outdoor and scheduled at 3:00pm in the afternoon… in Texas, the heat and humidity was getting to all the guests, after about 17 minutes. Half the guests that wore a suit were slowly but politely taking their jacket off. Mine was in my hand by the time the 39th minute kicked in.

The sun was smiling watching us politely fanned ourselves with the program sheets, at the same time pouring his radiance at those poor souls that are still holding out on taking off their jacket.

By the time it hit the 43rd minute, we found ourselves bombarded by one lone visitor. A fly. He was flying around scouting out every one of us one by one. I thought he knew who ate what at lunch, who did not brush his teeth that morning and who forgot to use his deodorant that afternoon. I thought that he was snaring at us, like a reality TV show trying to pick a poor winner.

He found one at the 46th minute! He was a big man, bearded with glasses on. He was one of the tough guys that refuse to take his jacket off, and thus soaking wet. Almost all the people at the ceremony, who were not listening to the preacher, were looking at the fly making acquaintances with this man. I bet all of us were relieved at that point because we were not the lucky winner.

The poor man fought hard to keep the little bugger away, but to no avail. At the 58th minute he surrendered and they lived happily ever after…

The moral of this story is that, if you ever go to an outdoor wedding, in the summer located between the artic belts. Don’t bother with the perfume to make you smell great. A fly doesn’t care if you smell nice, all he worries about is who stink the worst in the group. So remember kids, if you are second worst smelling lad in the bunch, you will turn out just fine.